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Dad decided to make chutney on Friday, and you know what that means; an awful stench. (No offence to Dad)

On Sunday it was just about bearable. He had finished adding all of the ingredients to the big silver pot, and you could tell there was definitely chutney in there as that distinct perfume started spreading across the kitchen. I didn’t think much of it, it was just another smell that would soon disappear.

But, to my horror, I returned from dancing on Monday only to be hit in the face by the terror that is the smell of Dad’s homeade chutney. I was shocked, so ran upstairs to escape the dreadful stench, only to be repelled again as it followed me onto the landing. My heart pounded as i saw that my bedroom door was open. I stepped in, holding my nose, then released my fingers. However, the awful fragrance of the chutney had reached my bedroom too! As we are in the middle of a period of snowing, the windows had not been openened, nor the extractor fan turned on. I took to grabbing my apple and lime body spray and releasing the perfume into all four corners of my bedroom, only to find that the smell in my room had worsened to the aroma of overpowering chutney, mixed with apple and lime! The whole house was over come with the smell of chutney, however this didn’t seem to affect anybody else in the family, especially not Mum as she is forever home cooking. Luckily the chutney is now ‘jarred-up’ to mature so the house is almost free from the smell.

Oh Dear!